What the hell have I done?

I couldn't control myself. I had another emotional breakdown and ruined a lot again. I have no idea if this damage can ever be repaired.
It's the first time that my sickness got me. I hate myself for not thinking longer before speaking. I wasn't myself and let my broken parts cause havoc.

This might have been the biggest mistake ever. I have no idea if this problem is fixable, and I am the only one to blame.

I hate myself right now. I hate my disease. I cause chaos again, in a time where chaos can ruin everything. I messed with our stability. I am stupid and unstable and I did not want all of this.

I have no idea what to do. Life can be a bitch.

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